Pretty much exactly what I had in mind, thanks!
Edit: For anyone who is trying to do the same thing, this line from @dj in combination with this
http://rejetto.com/forum/index.php?topic=11738.0, solved my problem completely for the time being. Since my particular use case has a unique user-agent, this seemed the best route to take. I know how and that it can be spoofed, but mainly this was an effort to save bandwidth and keep the logs clear. All my files are public anyway, and I just didn't want my logs filling up with spam for no good reason because some jackass wanted to find out if I had any secured accounts set up.
a couple of things to note:
You MUST set the root directory to a real folder
Try to put everything in root/properties/Diff template, and event scripts (alt+f6)
(If you don't know any better in the first place, thankfully I avoided some work by reading a little)
Cheers!